The point of black and white

The point which I am bringing out here is definitely not so colorful! But it is about colors.

Few days back, I heard a conversation between a six to seven-year-old boy and his grandmother in my neighborhood.

Sentences of the grandmother were something like, "Take bath. Look at you. You have become so black. You have got so dirt on your body." I heard no reply from that boy. He is just a little kid.

The next day, I again heard that boy's aunt saying the same thing, "Oh God! Look at you. This much dirt? Let me scrub you." This time, the boy replied, "No. Please don't scrub."

It didn't surprise me. It is a common mentality. Let's not talk about the gender differentiation now otherwise this blog will be 10 times bigger. But here I am talking about the color differentiation, I would say. If there are two kids of almost the same age, a third person will definitely differentiate them by their color tone first. They won't say it but they do mentally. The height of such sick mentality reaches when people go to see a newborn baby and they state, "Oh! She/he is so white just like her/his mother/father!" I mean, come on. She/he is just few hours old. At least spare her/him! Even parents start thinking like this after hearing such stupid sentences. How miserable it is!

Today I heard one more thing.
That same boy came out while his mother was busy washing clothes. She said, "Let me wash clothes first. Then you will take bath. These clothes are so dirty."
The boy asked, "Does the dirt on our body come from these clothes? That's why I am so black?" Again, I heard no reply. But I am sure that the mother didn't even notice anything. She kept washing clothes. She wasn't even concerned about it. (I wish she was!)

What I noticed is the innocence. They kept telling the boy and the boy grasped it. He doesn't even know the difference between skin tones, and he asked out of innocence.

When will we stop judging people on the base of their skin color? What is black, what is white  and what is wheat-ish? When will people understand the science behind the skin colors? How does skin color matter? How can the beauty be defined on such base? 

Flying Money!

Yesterday I watched a live 'Dayaro' for the first time in my life. I didn't understand most of it (as expected..), but I liked some of the dialogues and jokes. Overall, it was nice. After sometime, we left for home.

On the way, my husband asked, "How was it?"

I answered, "I saw flying money and that also live for the first time."

Yes. Money was flying. Most of you must have understood it by now.

In such functions, it is common to shower currency notes on artist, just to show happiness. When people get too happy with the artist or they get to involved in Bhajans, they do this.

I have heard about it and seen in movies, but saw something like this for the first time in reality. This sight caught all my attention. I was just observing this activity. I doubted, "No respect for money at all? What is this actually? I don't understand it at all. It is accepted in our society, but still I doubt it big time."

This was not it. Something shocked me more. A few men were there. They told two to three kids to go on the stage and gather all the money. Kids did whatever they were told to do. They gathered and put it in a big steel container. After sometime, people again showered money, so the kids again went on the stage and started gathering the money. At that time, the artist told that kid in mike while singing the Bhajans, "Haji bhega thava de (Let us get some more money then you gather it)."

Few days back, I got a video on a social media. It showed something like this. It also said that they were about to donate all the money they got. And it was few lakhs. So may be, with the amount they get in such functions they do charity. It is definitely a noble deed. I agree. But why to flaunt money? Why to show off? Why can't you simply go to the respective organization or place and donate it?

This tradition resembles our culture in one way. We have been taught to respect time. We have been taught to respect money rather than having cupidity for it. But when we see such thing in reality, it seems contradictory.

It is not right or may be, I am taking it in a wrong way. I still don't understand. In India people worship money through Lakshmi Pooja, but what I felt was disrespect for what you have earned.

Happy world book day!

I was reading newspaper with a coffee mug in the other hand. Something caught my attention which made my regular morning a special one.

I am a big fan of special days. Birthdays, anniversaries, etc. They give me good enough reason to celebrate. Today is a special day. It's nobody's birthday or anniversary. But it is a WORLD BOOK DAY.

HAPPY WORLD BOOK DAY TO ALL.....

It is a yearly event organized by UNESCO.

I did some research and found that in ancient time, stone, clay, tree bark and metal sheets were used to write upon. No punctuations were used. With the time, changes were made in writing and writing formats. One thing surprised me. Tablets were used at that time! But not the digital ones. It was a physical robust writing medium. It was categorized in few types. Like, clay tablet and wax tablet.

With time, the writing fashion and format changed. We started using papers. Pens and pencils were parts of revolution in styluses. Books come in different sizes and layouts. Cover pages got more attractive.

Books are categorized on the base of the content. For example, fiction, non-fiction, etc. There is a mass readership.

Books For Me..

I am addicted to books. I have a small collection of books(Its nothing compared to my father's collection!) which I want to grow more and more. Books are my stress buster. I have tried all forms of reading; e-books, e-book in wide screen phone, e-book in iPad and other gadgets. But honestly, nothing can replace papers.

This morning, in the article, I read how reading books inspires youth. It feels good to know that kids and youngsters too, prefer paper books. To encourage this, new concepts are emerging. Liberia is one of them. They have a system where you can order books, movies and plays online and they will deliver it.

Books played one of the most important roles in my life. I started writing. I love fictions. I have written a couple of fictions. Which are yet to go on the floor officially.

According to me, a book can help you to know your inner self. It has the ability to change the flow of your emotions, attitude and view towards your life and the world. I have said in my earlier blog that books are my best friend. They really are. They actually help me knowing the real me.

Books are very important part of my life. They keep me connected to the languages. Language; Respect all the languages, don't spoil them, maintain its dignity. That is one of the virtues that I have inherited.

Credit for the good books should go to their authors. They are the backbones of this piece of art. Hats-off to them. On this very special day, I want to say a big THANK YOU to all of them..

(While I am writing this, I just got a message that my husband has just placed an order for Sudha Murty's book which I was talking about this morning..He made my day.. whhhhoooppyyyyyyyyyyyy.......!!!!!!)

A mother of 5-and-a-half-year-old thinks, 'How would my kid make it to IIT?'

Mother A : "My little one is going to get an admission in convent very soon."
Mother B : "Oh Good! I am also planning to go for an inquiry at Shamaldas Vidyalaya."

Mother A : "Oh God! Not a convent?" (Putting both the palms on respective cheeks with eyeballs almost out!)
Mother B : "Y..yes" (She replied as is she had admitted her crime)

Mother A : "How would your kid make it to IIT then?"
Mother B : "What?"

Mother A : "You see. Now a days, English Medium is must. It prepares your kids for IIM and IIT. English Medium students become so smart."
Mother B : (Already lost in thoughts....)

END OF THE STORY..

Mother B has canceled to visit Shamaldas Vidyalaya and will convince her husband and other family members to go for some English Medium school.

What type are you? A or B? Well, none of them are wrong. It is a very normal conversation now-a-days. The other one is, "Which board?"

These must be very familiar sentences for you. You might have said or heard them. If I am not wrong, you must be remembering one. Right?

Well, the idea behind this blog is a photo which my photographer sister posted in one photography group. (I can't post the photo here as there is a rule of us, the photographer sisters, that no one can use each other's work) There were a group of school kids in an auto rikshaw with mixed facial expressions. Some were tired, some were playful, some were looking at the camera with question. But two things were common: the size of their school bags and an unseen burden.

Yes. The burden. I gave a caption to that photo, 'Burdened Innocence'

Kids are doing what they are told to do, Go to school. Go to tuitions. Go to music class. Learn piano. And many more things which we decide on behalf of the kids till their certain age. We try to do good for them. We want their future to be glorious. We are not wrong in that.

But along with this all, one bug has entered in our mind so firmly that we are not ready to remove it. That is MEDIUM. Gujarati Medium, English Medium, Hindi Medium and many more.

This should be decided by the parents and family only. But where is the logic? I mean if you are deciding on the base of such conversation which described above, then it is completely illogical. Go and survey. How many IITians and IIM students have done their schooling in their native language? It will score more than you have imagined. It is a simple thing. Why to complicate it?

How can you say if your 6-year-old kid would ever see IIT or not? You don't even know about his/her likes and dislikes. He/she is just a kid.

I am not saying that English Medium or the medium other than native language is bad. It is not. But to think that mediums other than English is bad should not be acceptable. Kid's smartness is not dependent on his/her medium of schooling. It is dependent on the environment he/she is living in, the people  he/she is living with, the exposure he/she is getting.

Many cities don't even have good and descent English Medium schools and convents. But still, "Going-with-the-flow" parents put their kids in such schools. Now, the only one who will suffer is the kid. He/she would neither be able to understand English nor his/her own native language. He/she would not be able to get involved in his/her basic social conversation. He/she would gradually cut-off from the social life. And that is definitely not healthy for any human being. And this is just a kid, a growing one. The more he/she meets different people, the more he/she learns. See, smartness is about these things too. It is not measured by his/her English vocabulary and fluency only.

There are some English Medium schools I know where they give your kids balanced knowledge, where equal importance is given to your native language too, where schooling is not burden for your kids any more. If your city has good convents and English Medium schools and if you can provide suitable environment for his/her healthy growth, and most importantly, if you and your family are confident about it, then go for it. I am repeating myself, It is not BAD.

I am 24 and still writing about such topic. Why? Because I have heard and seen such incidents. And from that day, this concept was very clear in my mind. I am brought up in an environment where good education is considered the base of one's upbringing, progress and personality and where all the languages are given equal importance. That is why I believe that whatever you learn, in whatever language, it should be best and descent enough for your growth, knowledge,success and personality development. Just try to think like that, don't go with the flow blindly and this will be so easy for you to choose a MEDIUM for your kid.

Educated Indian!

Assume that you are meeting a person for the first time who is standing in front of you. What would be your introductory question to him? Or how would you start your conversation? You would ask his name first. Then what?

For example, he says his name is Ajay. Then your would be something like this, "Ajay?"

You would wait for him to say his surname, right?

That's what we typical people do. A proper noun is never enough for us just for an introduction. I mean, that person himself is there in front of you, you can see him. You know his name now. You know his voice now. You know how he appears now. But no. That's not it. You have to know his surname. Why? Because you are eager to know his proper introduction which is accomplished by his caste and religion.

Once you get to know such detail, you will analyze him mentally even if you don't say it loudly.

This is how we educated people meet a stranger!

But what is the logic behind this? Why does such thing matter?

We are the people of 21st century. Why do we still believe in such things? Let me clarify one thing. There is nothing bad in knowing someone's surname, caste and religion, but the very next moment, analyzing him/her in mind, even subconsciously, has become our mindset.

Sometimes surname is not enough to know his caste, people ask him straight about his caste. That's the height. On asking, instead of answering, one should ask counter question, "Why do you want to know? Aren't my name and face enough for my introduction?"

To know a person better, any logical person would ask his education, qualification, profession. But No. One cannot stop himself from asking.

Caste classifies people.

Simplicity is the best wealth one can have. If you've got knowledge, share it, if you've got intelligence, implement it, if you've got money, help poor, but why to flaunt it? Swanking is one more disease that our society is suffering from.

The simpler you are, the wealthier you are. Really. People will respect your simplicity. And more than that, they will appreciate it.

We all should change with the time. Opinions are very important. But flexibility is equally necessary.
Accept the fact, embrace the change, be simple and enjoy the life.  
   

wHY dO wE gROW uP?

What's your age? Oh! I am extremely sorry for being ill-mannered. But seriously, what's your age? Don't answer me. Just tell yourself silently, in your mind. Let's assume your age is 25. 

Next task: Remember the day when you were just 1-day-old. (I know that you can't really remember the day when you were just 1-day-old. But you were. That's the universal fact!)

Another task: Try to visualize the whole journey of your life from your day 1 on the earth to today when you are 25(Or whatever your current age is). How was it? Exciting? Beautiful? Struggling? Smooth? It can be anything. It can be mixture of all this too. Different people have different stories.

My journey of 24 years(For now, I find this age reveal-able. But I would definitely mind when it will become reverse of the current figure.) has also been mixture of many moods: good, bad, excitements, dullness(which extremely less!), victories, losses, achievements, empty-handed, bright-student-who-chose-a-different-career-path-(finally), ambitious, despondent,etc,etc,etc.. (There is no last but the least!)

While writing, I got one more point which I found quite suitable for this blog. I got a message on social media. It was something about inner peace. It also included an example which was little techie. So I too, being techie, suddenly sent it to my techie husband(Who was sitting just in front of me, being techie, having all his focus on his MacBook's screen. No Offence!)

 

{Sorry for using one word repeatedly. But it suits, really}

After reading that message, he asked me, 'Have you experienced Inner-Peace?'

Quite a valid question for a person like me. Because I was a 'little' mischievous kid whom sophisticated people generally call 'Hyperactive' child. Coming back to the point, if I try to remember my journey from the day 1 on the earth till today, I can't see myself sitting at one place for more than an hour. It was quite impossible task for me as a kid. And may be that's why lunch or dinner had always been one of the tedious tasks for me.(Oh now I realize! Finally! Going to call my Mummy!)

But yes, when I try to remember if I ever had experienced inner-peace, 'Yes' comes in my mind. Kids are rarely quiet and stable. And I was not one of them. But the freedom they experience, the joy they have, an art of cherishing each moment of life they have are out of the world. Yes, 'Out of The World' is quite appropriate for them. Because they hardly care about the world. They know nothing about the world. All they can see is beauty. For them nothing is wrong or bad. Innocence keeps them away from all the dark sides.

We grow up with time: Physically, mentally and emotionally. All of you who have actually tried to recall their journey of life, would have noticed the one common thing: Few years back, being a care free kid, you were happier. But we all have to grow up, think about the future. A bright future. We all join the queue of people who are existing to be successful only. Successful person and successful human being. We grow up more. Then we think about the progress in professional life and personal life. We grow up more and more. Then we think about the retirement. 

This can be the typical journey. I am also one of you all.

But what actually made me write this blog is an observation and realization.

Dhruv, my nephew turned three on 11. We were all gathered at my brother's place. It was a cute family get together. Prayag, my elder sister's 2-year-old son was also there. Both the brothers were so busy with their respective toys of interest. Dhruv was handling a pair of 'Tablas'. (We all were so surprised to see his technique and natural ability of playing Tablas at the age of three!) Prayag was busy with his JCB, cars, and other vehicle toys that don't need petrol or diesel. 

(Mentioning JCB reminds me one question which has always been an unanswered one to me : Why do male kids like JCB? I mean they can't dig the floor of the house. And they even can't dig the actual land with a digging arm which is made of plastic. And my confusion increases even more as I cannot ask the kid even.)

But its okay for now. I will handle. Let's not discuss JCB here. 

So the over all scenario was like that. After some time, Prayag took a 'Dholak'. He tried to play it. Dhruv, in his cutest language, was teaching Prayag how to play it.

We elders(Yes, me too) were chatting, observing kids, and having a great fun. 

After sometime, Prayag's tiny and cute hand got hurt while opening and closing a mini gate. He started crying in his typical manner. Pressing upper lip with lower teeth having lower lip outwardly bent (Yes, exactly the same you have just imagined!) he rushed to his mother and hugged her. Injury was not major, he just got scared and that's why he came to his mummy so that she could soothe him. In no time, he forgot the pain and started playing again.  

This incident caught my attention. A kid could rush to his/her mother whenever he/she needs support. I call it 'Earthing'. Yes, for humans, we don't use this word, but when I see such attachment, only this word comes in mind. You need support. Emotional, moral, physical. 

Grown ups need moral support the most. At least I need. 

We grow up, become independent, learn new things in life. But whenever, in the hustle and bustle, we need moral support, why can't we rush to our parents like kids? Do we grow up for this? Why can't we show our weakness? Why can't we cry like kids? Why can't we leave everything and rush to mummy and papa? Why can't we break down? Why do we need to pretend to be strong in front of our parents? We all know that at the age of 50 even, we will remain kids for our parents. But we hesitate to show our pain, our problems. We don't want them to bother any more. We chose to solve our problems on our own. But when I saw Prayag rushing to his mummy, only one question struck me; "Why do we grow up?"

  

  

It is all about Time!

What does life teach?

It teaches you to value time. I am not talking about productivity. You will meet many people who talk about this and advise you regarding this.

I was told to respect time, to value time. It is precious. Many phases you see in life, and all of them are about time. They are divided as time slots. It can be a phase of student life, phase of college life(  I am mentioning it separately because many believe that college life is the most carefree and full of freedom.), phase of initial professional life, a phase between engagement and wedding, and many more.

When you move ahead in life, you become busier. But when you look back, you will realize how precious that time really was! I do. I do realize.

When I look back, many days, many moments, many phases of my life float in front of my eyes. At that time also, I knew that that time would pass, but I was a carefree kid who was so busy enjoying her life. Who didn't want to see anything else, but beauty of life she was having. She wanted to make best of it, always. She never bothered about the future which she could not see then. She wanted to live in present, enjoy each each breath God has gifted. She wanted to live each day, each moment with the beautiful people she was blessed with. In her eyes and heart, everybody and everything was beautiful. For her, the world was unstained.

And now, after coming this far in life, I miss that time. I actually value the time which is already passed, the time which is left behind.

I wish I could live that time again, but unfortunately, God has not created any CTRL+Z buttons for us!

Being a kid, a daughter, a sister, a friend, a student and then a lecturer, each role was memorable. Each role was fun. Today, only thing I could do is, memorize it and share it in words ONLY.

All you there, reading this blog, I just want to tell you that time is actually VALUABLE. Enjoy it with whole heart. Because once it passes, you can not drag it back.

Books

    

                     

  Books are my best friends! They really are. I love reading. I don't know when I developed this hobby. But now, this is just not a hobby. It has become a very essential part of my life. A thought reading makes me as happy as a thought of going to some beach for a vacation. When I was a kid, I was not a serious reader, but with the growing age and maturity, I became a sincere reader. I used to read in Gujarati which is my mother tongue. Then diverted to English. 

                      

                        I belong to a family the importance of art and science are equally high. I have inherited both. I am a science student and currently active in art. The importance of language is understood by us very well. I have learnt to respect language and any form of art and artist. I strongly believe that any artist should be appreciated. 

When reading took a very important place in my life, I got inspired to write as well. Approximately two years ago, when I started writing. I wrote one fiction and have a couple of plots ready. I am working on these projects. When I read something, the very next moment, I feel like writing. 

                    

  One of our relatives has developed a mini library at her home. When I visited her place, I was astonished. I have a dream which I often share with my husband. And that is to open a library with a coffee shop. Yes, a coffee shop. When I have a mug of strong coffee in one hand and a book in the other hand, my day is made. And that is, probably, my retirement plan! :-) And seeds of that dream have already been sown.

I have a small collection of books and have full plans to grow it as soon as possible. You know, when a Currier boy comes carrying Flipkart's or Amazon's parcel, I jump with happiness like a kid does when he gets his favorite chocolates.

  

               

If somebody asks me about my favorite place to spare time, it would always be a beach or a library. (Now-a-days, it is Crossword!) I carry books during travelling as a very essential part of my bag. 

 

To start writing blogs was my husband's idea. And to be an active blogger was another idea. And that is very important too. I feel good when I do blogging. 

                   I just finished reading Mahashweta by Sudha Murty. This book was in the stores a few days back, and now it is in my library as a read one. Now I am going to start Chetan Bhagat's What Young India Wants. I got these books recently from Crossword. When I was looking for books there, I asked my husband curiously, "When would I see my books here?" 

                      

            

                 Coming back to the very first line, Books are my best friends. They will always be with you until you leave them. And I am never going to leave them. They are the source of peace in my life.

                  

                     

Vision Behind The Photo

      
On Saturday, I clicked the first photo where 3 pigeons are sitting on the railing. The left most one was unable to fly. He could only move few inches. He was trying so hard. He was chirping, may be because of pain of helplessness. The other two came to help. It was the 4th floor.


On the 2nd floor, there was a nest as you can see in the second image. On that very day, there were two eggs in that nest. I wanted to click a photo but didn't have my camera with me. So I had to go down to that nest to get the close-up. But after seeing that helpless pigeon, I decided not to go near the nest otherwise that pigeon would get very scared and in-secured. So I thought I would bring my camera with me on Monday.


Today is Monday. I saw the nest. And as you can see in the second photo which is clicked today, the nest is empty and all those pigeons are also there including that handicapped one. They frequently came near the nest to see and went back empty handed!


What I felt today is, a real HELPLESSNESS. The helplessness which you feel when you have to let somebody go very far from you because of your own HELPLESSNESS.


I remembered one incident. One of my friends lost her younger sister after a long suffering period. All of us was in shock. It was quite expected yet so painful.


The next day, I came home. I shared it with my father. How that family tried hard to make her survive and in the end, how they failed due to some adverse medical conditions.


I still remember the sentence my papa said, "Do you see, beta? How it feels when you are helpless and you have to see your loved one going so far from you? Who does want it to happen? But its the HELPLESSNESS."

A Glimpse Of My Fictions..

Here I am posting A Glimpse Of My Fiction: The first chapter of my first fiction.. ( On which I am still working)  

Sophia, the only child of Richard D’Souza; a very well known business tycoon and Sara D’Souza; a house-wife, wakes up at 7 in the morning. When first ray of sunshine lightens her right chick, beautiful smile comes automatically. The sun has always been the first one to wish her good morning. She gets up and puts her legs down on a velvet carpet. And now it’s the time for the servants. Their duty begins now. One for to get her the slippers, one for to get her the overcoat, one for to get her orange juice and if she doesn’t want juice and demands something else, then one servant is there to get that ‘else’. And that ‘else’ has always been coffee, a strong coffee. And she wants coffee only if she had hit the bed so late the previous night. Generally she likes to wake up early in the morning; she is rich but not a rich brat. She is a regular, disciplined and sophisticated girl having a very generous nature. Though she is called ‘Madam’ by all the servants, she is very humble and polite to them all. One more thing about Sophia’s discipline, though she is rich and richest among her friends, she has never got unnecessary things on demand. It was Sophia’s parents’ discipline more than her. Which is quite surprising but true. Her father’s only motto of his life was, “Respect the time and money. If you don’t respect them, they won’t respect you.”

Apart from being a little mischievous, she is mature enough to handle even difficult situations.

 Richard and Sara have never been “Rapunzel’s Parents”. But they want her to live a disciplined life; well that’s the different thing that she is living a princess life surrounded by half-dozen of servants who are only for her all the time.

Sophia doesn't like people who show-off their high class. And that’s why she hardly attends any society party or any business function.

Apart from this, Sophia has her own world. She writes, sings, sometimes dances.

All the relatives, friends, business partners and even employees think that after doing MBA from the Oxford as per her family tradition, Sophia will handle her father’s business, but she has never thought about this. She always says that she doesn’t know what she wants to do but whatever she will do will be creative. She has just finished MBA. It sounds funny to her that she would be part of this corporate world.

Sophia was never bothered about her career because her parents are very flexible about it. But still Richard thinks that it would be appropriate if she joins his business. Though the staff of his firm has become his second family now, and till today, everyone has proven his trustworthiness, he still thinks that if his daughter, his blood takes this responsibility, and then it would be better than anything else. And moreover, he finds Sophia very capable and talented in this field.

She has been one of the top students in the Oxford. She has a very bright record as a business student. So Richard’s hope and wish increased. But he had never shown his eagerness.

Vision Behind the Photo..

I clicked this photo at Diu.. Nagoa beach. If you can see, there is a bottle attached with the string which that kid is pulling and dragging.

That's just a kid. He didn't even know what he was pulling. It was a bottle of alcohol. He was happy enough as he got something to play with. It caught my attention. Thanks to the shutter speed of my camera, I could click it clearly.

Such situations always make me think how this world is! It has all the colours of different lives. At that same place, many kids were with their families. Few came in luxurious cars and few in rickshaws. All I could do was observe and think. How all same humans have different lives, lifestyles, destinies, luck, or anything you say to describe humans' life!

Sometimes we could help people. But sometimes we could not due to their own self-respect. And when I could not help them makes me feel helpless big time. It makes me realise that whatever I have is of no use if I am not able to provide it to someone who really needs it.